A Brief TRANSFORMERS 2: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN Review

The other day my friend, Sam, suggested we go see a movie.  We’d just finished dinner and the only movie that started in less than two hours was Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen.

It was awful.

I don’t have to sit here and tell you, you’ve read the reviews.  Maybe you saw it.  You don’t need me to tell you that the movie is racist and immature with wooden performances and confusing action scenes.  It’s a Michael Bay movie, that’s kind of how they all are.

I don’t need racism in my Transformers.  (Yes, I’m aware the original television series had its share of stereotypes.)  I don’t need to see a pair of small dogs humping.  I don’t need someone trying to convince me that Megan Fox is an attractive human being.  She’s orange.  Like, really orange.

No, I’m not making this about color.

I’d also like to personally thank Bay for making Wheelie– the absolute worst part of Transformers: the Movieeven more obnoxious.

But you know what I really don’t need to see?

Multiple instances of tentacle rape.  Soundwave’s co-opting of a military communications satellite is sexualized and whoever the Decepticon Pretender– yeah, they brought Pretenders in– is that tries to seduce Sam, spends the majority of her/his/its screentime shoving or attempting to shove it’s tongue/tail into him.

Comic Reviews: 07-01-09

Comic Reviews: 07-01-09

A pretty big week in comics, one might say: Captain America: Reborn and a new Justice League limited run series, a week after McDuffie’s exit. They also offer some new issues of some of Marvel’s and DC’s unique limited series. Since I don’t have much to say this week, let’s get right into the comics!

Justice League: Cry for Justice #1
Irredeemable #4
The Mighty #6
Destroyer #4
Batman and Robin #2
Captain America: Reborn #1

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Drunk Reviews: From Dusk Till Dawn

I’m not editing this.

I saw this movie in 7th grade, on VHS, in the basement of my friend’s house. I vaguely remember having no idea what the fuck was going on. This movie, to me, should have NEVER been made, but the earth is better for it. I vaguely remember some not-that-great tits, and that is coming from a 7th grader.

So, I haven’t seen this movie since then. We are talking…12 years. And now it is on TNT. I missed the first half hour?-ish and I”m considerably drunk.

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Shameless Self-Promotion

My Star Trek/X-Men crossover retrospective is up at Needcoffee.com.  Bask in my self-mockery!

Comic Reviews: 06-24-09

It is a normal part of my weekly comic reading habits to arrange my weekly purchases in order of what I guess to be least-to-most good. This way, my reading will be progressively enjoyable. I do this rather arbitrarily based on previous reading enjoyment, currently plots, and covers. This week, my order of comics was: Thunderbolts #133, Wolverine: Weapon X #3, Runaways #11, Viking #2, Uncanny X-Men #512, Detective Comics #854, Nova #26, Guardians of the Galaxy #15, Green Lantern #42, and Thor #602. In retrospect, I would have placed Runaways first on this list, as I haven’t read any of the previous run, and was excited too see that a new creative team was involved, especially one spearheaded by a woman, as I’ve enjoyed Immonen’s previous work on the Hellcat mini. I however, was eating a burrito for lunch, and thought it might be weird for people to see me reading quite seriously a comic full of scantily clad jailbait. So, I saved it until I returned home and read it on the toilet. Thunderbolts I have been enjoying, but was slightly turned off by the Deadpool story arc, as I don’t really care for Daniel Way’s writing of Deadpool - I do, however enjoy how he is popping up throughout the Marvel universe, and bothering people from series to series (It is my new opinion that while the Marvel universe becomes a darker, grittier, more politically cynical environment, with villains in the role of previous Heroic Power, Deadpool is becoming more and more a Traditional comic book superhero). Moreover, Detective Comics is new to my purchases, since I was pretty excited about the new creative turn, curious about how they’d handle a female lead character, particularly a lesbian, and was blown away by the art while glancing at previews. Rucka is nothing to sneeze at, either. Nova and Guardians used to be in the opposite order, but Cosmo is currently the greatest character in all of Marvel. Thor has been at the end (most enjoyed) of the reading order spectrum for a long time now. Even though people complain that Thor, like Superman is over powered, the joy in the story-telling is in its subtlety, and Straczynski does a masterful job.

So, I guess I should start rambling about the actual comics now.

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Because I’m That Nerdy…

Here’s “Weird Al” Yankovic’s new video.

The Last Time Cap Came Back From the Dead

Operation: Rebirth Page 1

Writer Ed Brubaker killed Captain America two years ago in the aftermath of Civil War.  Since then, fans have wondered how and when Steve Rogers is coming from the dead (a given, considering the revolving door on Superhero Heaven and the impending movie).

Marvel announced today what everyone’s known: That the original Sentinel of Liberty is returning from the dead in the upcoming comic Reborn.

But I want to look back at the last time Cap returned from the dead: Mark Waid and Ron Garney’s Operation: Rebirth.

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JSA Vs. Kobra: Engines of Faith #1

It’s highly unusual when X-Factor is not my favorite comic of the week.  What’s even more unusual is that my favorite comic of the week is a JSA book.

Writer Eric Trautmann (who worked on Checkmate with Greg Rucka) focuses on Mr. Terrific, a character who’s been criminally underused in the main JSA title for a few years now.  The book does spin out of events shown in the late Checkmate serie, as well as Final Crisis, but prior knowledge of these stories isn’t required to enjoy the story.

Trautmann has a handle on the characters, a better one than Johns did, in my opinion.  Don Kramer’s art is gorgeous and perfectly suited to an espionage-influenced story such as this.

If you don’t pick this series up, there’s something very, very wrong with you and you should seek help.

Mea Culpa

I know it’s been a while since I’ve updated. A thousand apologies.

Seriously, I’m on my knees here, begging your forgiveness.

Things have been kind of crazy around here lately and I let the blog fall to the wayside.

No longer. I’m back and should be posting daily again.

The Phantom Menace: Ten Years Later

Twitter’s been lit up all day with people making snide remarks about today being the tenth anniversary of the release of Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace.

I’ve never seen it.

I was never a big Star Wars fan, preferring comics or Star Trek by the time I was old enough to have a preference.  The only reason I know the plot of the film is because of this.

I do have some memories associated with the movie, however.  You see, my best friend (and later roommate) in high school was a huge Star Wars fan.  (What do they call them, anyway?)  Senior year, after prom, we all went back to his house to hang out, drink, play pool and watch movies.  I’d left briefly to take my date home and arrived to find him putting in his VHS copy of The Phantom Menace.

I recall racist Asian accents before I lost consciousness.

A Brief TRANSFORMERS 2: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN Review

The other day my friend, Sam, suggested we go see a movie.  We’d just finished dinner and the only movie that started...

Drunk Reviews: From Dusk Till Dawn

I’m not editing this. I saw this movie in 7th grade, on VHS, in the basement of my friend’s house. I vaguely remember having no idea...

The Phantom Menace: Ten Years Later

Twitter’s been lit up all day with people making snide remarks about today being the tenth anniversary of the release of Star Wars Episode...